War & Peace

I'm losing the war on my life. Nothing seems to be going as I planned. I'm not in control of things the way I used to be.

There are two at war within me, desiring lone control of my life. Two who are very different, yet very similar. They both have a plan for my life... but only one leads to abundant living. They both seek glory... but only one seeks it for one who is worthy. They both seek peace... but only one knows how to find it.

There hasn't always been this war with in me. For a long time, only one controlled my life. It made plans for me, but they only led to ruin. It sought my glory, but I was unworthy of it. It sought peace, but found none.

It seems the war began when the second came into my life. It took a while for it to get a foothold against its adversary, but once it did, it began to show that it's plans for me would not lead to ruin. It refused seek my glory, but instead the glory of one who is deserving. It sought peace, and found it.

And so, even now the two do battle with in me. Why do I not let the second win, you ask? I regret to say that it is because the first is my own self. To let the second win means giving up control of my life. That is no easy surrender.

There have been many hard fought battles, but it seems now the tides of war are finally shifting. I may be losing the war on my life, but I've never won so much.